This morning I asked this question via status message:  “If you could twitter or facebook status a piece of advice to me right now based on what you’re going through, what would it be?

Here were your answers:

Via Twitter:
“Grace is far more powerful than justice.  Live above the line.” @dbpayne
“Make a list and knock it down 1 by 1.” @k_seas
“Cling to God in desperation as if your very life depended upon it (in all actuality, it does). This is the essence of true faith.” @ianmatthewrice
“Keep looking forward.” @Brandonwhittall

Via Facebook
“Suffer well.” Ryan
“Buy cheap sunglasses, so when you break them, it doesn’t hurt as much.” Clay
“Pick a career you enjoy.” Tony
“Put all your cares and fears in God’s hands – for He is in control.” Denise
“Watch out for cheap cocaine.” Mike B.
“If part of the everyone is missing is missing, part of the needy goes missing as well. Acts 2:44-45″ Steve B.
“God is so good to provide what we need at the perfect timing – not mine – So very thankful.” Melaney
“Parenting is alot tougher than what it seemed at 18.” Michelle, Part 1
“More income and less hours worked for it.” John
“For every mountain, there is a miracle.” Tina
“Parenting is also tons more fun than I thought at 18.” Michelle, Part 2
“Patience is a virtue and understanding is a must.” Darlene

All right, your turn.  You have any wisdom to add to this list?

I wanted to knock out my friend with this box

Its no surprise to people that I like to win.  I enjoy it very much.

So last night I ran into a bit of a quandry as 4 other guys entered my house for an inpromtu game night.  We decided to play “Settlers of Catan”, a trading/build your own civilization type board game.  Usually this particular game is four players, but we happened to have the expansion pack, which allowed us to have 5-6 players.  We had 5.

So how much do I like to win?  This is a question I have asked myself alot in the last several years.  I certainly have toned down my competitive nature in the last few years, which has been good for events like board games and pick up basketball, though in life, it has tended to make me a bit complacent (But that’s for another post).

So as we started the game, two of my friends playing found themselves on the outside looking in, and it quickly became a three player game in practice.  So as the game progressed, the other two turned their attention away from winning to making sure I didn’t.

We finished the game, and I was pretty irritated.  One of my friends, (who’s probably reading this now, and who I will not name, nor do I want him to name himself) who was particularly helping the winning competitor, started calling me a “sore loser” for being irritated.  I don’t really think I was actually being a “sore loser”.  I was only irritated because it felt like if I’m going to invest time into a 3-hour game, I would prefer there not to be an asterisk by the winner’s name.

All that said, I had a great time last night with my friends, and I realize that nights like that are much more than who wins the game.  But I ask you now, because I value your opinion:

By being irritated, was I being a “sore loser”?

"You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, whose thoughts are fixed on you! - Isaiah 26:3 (NLT)

I love my wife.  I thought of this this morning when I woke up and realized how amazing she is.  She compliments me so well that I have no idea how I lived my life without her. (other than foolishly)

I love the team that I work with @ Fellowship.  They are great guys who want to see God use our church to connect and lead people into a growing relationship with Jesus Christ.  I just had lunch with 4 of the 5 and was reminded how much I love what I do.

I love my close friends.  Many of whom I can call at a moments notice if I need advice or just someone to talk to, and they are real and solid.  I won’t name them all, but you know who you are.

I love my family.  My dad and mom and sisters and extended family who have all given me solid encouragement to fall in love with God and have a good time doing it!

When you put all these people together, not in an actual physical space, but in a special place in my mind, and I begin to realize how God has blessed me in my life, and is growing me everyday by helping me get rid of the junk and see the beautiful parts of who He has made me to be – His “divine guidance” – an incredible wave of peace comes over me.

And I see that I’m right where I need to be.

Before I get into my post for the day, it appears there are some nice guys out there still.  Specifically one named Romo, who was not even out for the publicity.  Earth to Romo:  It makes it really hard to hate the Cowboys as I’ve done all my life if you continue to pull stunts like this.

Now on to the real reason we’ve come together.

I am on the phone a lot.  I mean a lot.  It seems sometimes that the phone is permanently atached to my ear, and I hate the feeling when the phone gets warm and begins to melt into my ear hole.  But I have quite a few friends and I try to stay in touch with them on a regular basis, as well as people who I’m pouring my life into here at the FC.

But sometimes it gets out of control when I’m forgetting some people and don’t have time to call others and I talk to others too much.  I mean, I’m trying to balance my life here, so how do I do this?

Well this morning I created a call list of people that I need to call on a weekly basis, people I need to call on a monthly basis, and people I need to call on a quarterly basis.  I do this, not so it can become a routine, but because I care about the people in my life and want to be intentional about keeping in contact with them.  So out of authenticity, I’ve decided to share with you some people I owe a call to very soon, and pray that they will forgive me for the injustices I have cast upon them.

Brian Wilson
Garret Walker
My two sets of grandparents – I am such scum!
Clay Davis
Chad Ridgeway
Remy Range
Ray Pierce
Brian Howe
Brandon King
Cj Maloney
Jim and Brandon Peper
Sue Huey
Tim Payne
Gary Trimm

This is not the call list, and I certainly will not show it to you, however, it is a few people I have not called on the list in an appropriate amount of time.  Shame on me.

So this is something I’m doing to help myself keep in contact with friends and associates and become wiser with my time in the area of communication.  If you would like to be added to the list, please let me know.

Is there anyone you should have called by now?

I had a very interesting experience recently on Facebook. Facebook has this feature where I can find people who are friends with two or more of my friends. The thinking is that if there is someone who knows a collection of my friends, then probably I know that person too. This theory falls short when it comes to family members, but as far as friends, it has been very helpful in finding them from different kinds of connections.

So a few months ago, a person was recommended to me (by Facebook) who connected with two friends of mine. ow the interesting thing about this connection, once removed, was that these two people that were connected to this person were fron two very very different eras of my life and two ery different geographical locations.

The two friends this guy was connected to were Jennifer Yost and Zac Normandin.

This may not seem very interesting to you, but allow me to explain. I grew up with Jennifer in Fremont, Ohio (pop. 16,000) Our parents worked together and the Yosts went to our church.
Jennifer was a few years younger than me, but we always got along and were friends. She was closer to my sister Amie than me however. We basically knew each other from 1985 – 1993. From what I can gather, Jennifer now lives somewhere in the midwest between Detroit and Chicago.

Fast forward 10 years. I had moved to Massachusetts and was working at the church I’m currently at, and then I took a job part time teaching at a Christian school up here. Zac Normandin was one of my students. He now lives in Manchester, New Hampshire with his wife.

So the person who connects them lives in Tampa, Florida and when I asked him via Facebook message how he knows them both, he simply said that a mutual friend connectd them all. Fascinating.
All this to say that the world is getting smaller, and I love every minute of it.

In honor of this, let’s play a game. I’m going to pick 10 people randomly on my facebook account, and I’d like to see how many of them you know.

Alicia Walton Parsons
Rachel O Connor
Edward paek
Steven MacArthur
Mark Salyer
Chris Destratis
Karla Bell Totten
Dee Dee Huey
Amy Lula
Steve Francis

Ready…Go!

Don MIller prays at the DNC

Ilove the web 2.0! 

This morning I was catching up on my blogs (I had about 120 I had to scroll through), and I found something very profound.  And this time, it wasn’t in Seth Godin’s blog.  If you haven’t read his blog, and you’re into Marketing even on a marginal level, go and read it right now.  Everything he writes is profound.

Anyway, back to my point.  This morning I was reading the blog of my new friend (of the last year or so) Eric.  Eric is a web developer amongst other things and has taught me a lot through the mediums of conversations and blogging about web 2.0.  One of the things Eric is truly passionate about is politics.  Eric likes democrats.

In his latest post, Eric gives a fairly even-handed review of his thoughts on McCain’s choice for running mate, and connects to the site of my best friend from high school (this has been several years by the way) Clay, who runs the site, “Reluctant Republicans”.  Clay is also truly passionate about politics.
Clay likes republicans.

As a friend of both of them, I can appreciate their thoughts on this subject and read each and every post on the subject fairly thoroughly.  But the point of this post is once again connection.
At no point in my life has Clay and Eric ever even been in the same state at the same time that I know, except for maybe this summer when Clay and his family took a vacation to NYC, but here they are, even in a subtle way, connecting their thoughts so that viewers on their blogs can see where they are both coming from. Not to mention they both have impacted my life in several ways,

I come from the end of an age where hearing from someone who differed from you was betrayal, and now its the best way to come to a conclusion.  So thank you to my friends who offer two different sides of a very important subject these days.  Also thank you to Don Miller, author of “Blue Like Jazz”, for this post in his new blog.

And thank you to you…for reading and sharing your thoughts.

Yesterday Mike Burns, shown here, returned to Germany from whence he came.  Mike and I always have a great time playing Yahtzee, Monopoly, and Volleyball,and pretty much making fun of each other in our attempt to be #1.
In honor of his return from his short visit to new England, I thought I would share a list of some of my closer friends since high school,and links to what they’re doing if they have one.  Most of the following people I still have contact with.

Clay Davis - Friend in high school, and have seen each other at least twice a year since then in my pilgrimage to the homeland of Ohio.
Brandon King, Derek Johnson, & Chad Klassen -Friends in college (and horrible influences on my life)
Chad Ridgeway – My best friend in college who has no link to any page anywhere.  Unbelievable!
Dave Huey – He’s been my book club partner, my roomate, my secret Keeper, my fellow thief, and my jukebox.  Certainly this man is a genius.
Ruben Cimbron – Travelled NBT together, moved to Massachusetts and wreaked havoc on everything we laid our eyes upon.  I can’t believe ROO is getting married in August.
Remy Range – The first WPI student I ever met, and besides Burns, the craziest.
Steve MacArthur - Was in my youth group at this church (sometimes I have no clue what I’m thinking) and our friendship has gone on through the ages. And we’ve certainly aged.
Ray Pierce - Carie and I are taking our vacation with this guy and his wife, who is way cooler than he is.
Brandon Whittall – I taught him everything he knows.  Not really, but it sounds good.
Kevin Richardson – This guy taught me everything he knows and I still havent got a clue.
Mike Burns – No one can really be like that, can they?

Share with me. Who are your friends?

Thats me, the fourth from the front on the left
I am so busy relationally right now, I can’t even believe it.
And I have no clue how to slow it down or even if I should slow it down.
My schedule is filled with people, people, people.
From people at Fellowship, to people in the Central Massachusetts area, to friends visiting from out of town.
I haven’t had a busier two months (July and August) relationally since college, but don’t tell anyone I went there.
A shout out to my beautiful wife Carie (third from the front on the right) for her patience and love through the busyness.

And all thanks to God!  I love my life!

Yesterday I went with a group of guys to what one might call a “guy comedy” type movie.  Please forgive me for stereotyping this way, but really it was the exact opposite of a “chick flick” so this is the best way to express what I was seeing.  I barrelled over in laughter more than a few times during the film, and though I would not recommend it (not because it wasn’t funny), I must say it did stimulate  “an audible expression or appearance of merriment” within me.

MY FAVE LINE IN THE MOVIE:  One of the characters was singing (not very good) to the other character, and afterwards, the one who was listening says with tears in his eyes,”Your voice is the combination of Fergie and Jesus.”  The way he said it made me laugh so hard I thought something was going to pop inside of me.  I now have this as a flair on my facebook account.  Thanks Neil.

So the whole point of this post is this:  Afterwards the four guys (including me) who saw the film stepped out of the theater laughing mildly and kind of calm.  Then one of us reminds us of one of the parts of the movie, then another of us, makes a quote from the movie, and we were off!  On our way back to the car, we started laughing.  I mean rolling.  Uncontrollable laughter.  We all jumped in the car, and there was more laughter.  I couldn’t even move the car because I was afraid of getting in an accident due to the tears rolling down my face.  And when we were about to stop, we would start laughing again. 

For five full minutes, four adult men in a car parked at the local movie theater laughed loud without being able to stop. It was one of the most hilarious things that have happened to me in a long time, and I’d like to thank Brandon, Brandon, and Neil for making it all possible.

I’ve never laughed so hard in all of my life.

John 15:13
“Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”

Depending on who you are, you like to be in certain kinds of relationships.  You’ve probably said or heard things like this:
“I like having lots of good friends who I can be around all the time”  or
“I only have a few very close friends, who I share my life with” or
“Wow, I hate people, and especially you Marty.”  (please don’t say this, as I would be greatly upset)

Your relationships make up the person you are, and this is not a bad thing, but no matter which one of these (preferably not the last) you are, let me challenge you to go beyond a cultural mandate and do what people don’t expect of you.
For instance, the first statement is where I live.  I used to have tons of friends, and none of these relationships were very deep.  Then a friend challenged me on this, and I “worked on it” – developing closer ties to individuals.

“sorry, she doesn’t count in this question, but she can cook up a storm.”

Or if you are one of those people who have a few close friends (not counting your computer, your mom, or a bottle of Jack Daniels), it might be worth going outside of your comfort zone to reach out to more people.

How do you like your relationships cooked?